I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
