i don't like sucking hair
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Randomize
