How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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