Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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