Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
