I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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