i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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