He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize