he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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