He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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