This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
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Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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