It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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