Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
