Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
