Nicole vs. Life
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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