Non-Jews are for practice
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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