Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize