Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
