Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
