Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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