Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm getting married
To pizza
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Randomize
