so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
