i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
