you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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