only if we run a train.
done.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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