If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
