New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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