i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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