I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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