All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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