Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Randomize
