Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
