yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
