At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
