Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
