Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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