I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
