Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Every concussion has its silver lining
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
