I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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