I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
