I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize