this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
