i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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