If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I had to cum in my sink.
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