I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
