I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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