before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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