have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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