Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
