Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
