the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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