Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
